January 5th, 2008

it hasn't even been two weeks since we officially became engaged. these are such happy times! I love being able to talk with Jesse about our wedding, or our home, or our kids--there is so much excitement about the future!

At the same time, we are cherishing every moment of right now, too. Being engaged is amazing. My heart is nearly bursting with joy, and realizing that Jesse shares the same feeling is exhilarating. I love the way that he plays with my ring, and the gentle way he still kisses my finger, the gentle look in his eyes...

I'm staying with Gramma and Papa again until school starts (jan 14). Jesse is back on campus because he is an RA, but anyone else that wants to be there has to pay $350. It's so nice to be back in town and not have school! Every day when I get off work, Jesse picks me up and then we go get something to eat, go see a movie, or just head back to Gramma and Papa's to relax. We've worked on wedding things the last few days and have actually gotten a lot done! We designed a wedding website yesterday, and I'm so excited! www.muellerandbrubaker.weddings.com . We also went through the Lutheran Service Book to look for hymns we would like to have in our wedding, as well as seeing the layout of a wedding liturgy and dividing things up between his pastor and my dad so that they are each involved. I'm really thankful with the input Jesse has given so far, and I'm happy that he is so involved!

Yesterday and today, I have been in a lot of pain and I haven't felt up to doing anything. We were planning on spending today at Disneyland, but when I woke up, I knew that wasn't happening. Jesse waited until I had taken a nice long bath and then he came over to take care of me. We spent the day on the couch watching movies, reading, and filling out silly quizzes online. Times like these make me so thankful for someone who loves me enough to take care of me through everything, to provide as much comfort as he can for me, and to love me even when I'm not feeling particularly loveable. Thank You, God!!!

He is such an amazing guy. I'm so blessed. He called me "fiancee" again tonight...the thought gives me goosebumps!

I can't wait to be Mrs. Jesse Brubaker!